THE 20'S IS UPON US AGAIN - By Alysha Badiani
Less than 6 months away from 2020! Soon the ‘20s’ will be referring to the 2020’s, not the 1920’s. (How crazy, right?)
Our lives today are so different to what they would have been 100 years ago. Over the past century technology has advanced at exponential rates, but have we matched that same growth on an individual level? While society has advanced in many areas such as women’s rights, freedom of speech, and access to great education, we have still fallen short in many other aspects, especially in self-care.
As a society, we have also become more mindful, we meditate more, we practise yoga and are more connected with one another. Yet anxiety levels, mental health issues, body dysmorphia and the increased desire for cosmetic surgery. In fact, it’s at an all-time high.
I have struggled with accepting my own body image and constantly felt like I was not enough. Sadly, I know I’m not the only one that has felt this way. I used to mask my confidence; really struggled with my self-esteem and feeling confident in my own skin. I didn’t want people to think I was egotistical or selfish, and instead would always put myself down. I would always find something about myself that needed to be improved, and I never learned to be nice to myself.
I struggled with giving myself the same love and affection as I gave others. I struggled with seeing beauty in myself as I would see in others. I looked at other people and thought their grass was SO much greener. I knew no one was perfect, but I found their imperfections beautiful. I had never appreciated my own grass or looked at my imperfections in a positive light. How and why was I doing this to myself?
The worst part of this, is that I never thought my lack of self- confidence and low self-esteem was a problem. I actually believed this was a healthy way to continue to seek self- improvement.
I felt deflated from my negative mindset and was tired of listening to my negative thoughts. I then realised that for the rest of my life, I have one relationship that will last longer than any other. It’s the relationship I am in with myself. Through realising this, I knew I was the only one that could make the changes I so badly needed. I had to start taking care of myself first and foremost. If I didn’t start to take care of myself first, how could I expect anyone else to care for me in the same way?
I realised I should love myself, I should be confident in myself, no matter where I am along my journey. In fact, in loving myself and being more confident, I would be more productive in my life and in a better place to pursue my dreams.
I know I’m not the only one who has gone through a spell of being hard on themselves; the importance of self- love are vital lessons we all need to learn, and ones we are never taught. I knew money didn’t buy happiness, but I had not learned that happiness is a mindset. It was in my own hands to have a life full of happiness, joy and love.
You might be thinking this is selfish – well yes, it is! But being selfish isn’t always a bad thing. I’m not saying to be unfair and greedy. I’m not saying to serve yourself more than anyone else. I’m saying be kind to yourself and serve yourself as much as you would others. If you have a cake, don’t give yourself a bigger piece than others, but make sure you take a slice for yourself too. Likewise, if you see the beauty in others around you, make sure you see the beauty in yourself as well. The more love you have in your heart, the more you love yourself, and the more you have to give others.
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Throughout my book, BeYoutiful You, I talk about the importance of building a strong mindset, building on your self-confidence and how to practise self-love. Building a strong mindset for yourself will help you build your clarity in your life. Having clarity will let you pursue your dreams and have a fulfilled life. A lack of clarity leaves space for negativity and doubt.
The largest pool of talent in the world is found at the grave. Let’s learn from history and try not to let it repeat itself. As a society, we are in a position to be able to pursue our dreams more now than ever before. Love yourself and pursue your dreams. Do something today that your tomorrow- self will be proud of.
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